Let's share embarrassing non fatal wrecks

[backwithabang]

Ok. Yesterday, cruising down the main drag in north buffalo ny on my 68 triumph chop going about 40 I get insta rear wheel lockup. So I started into the inevitable skid, but had some control. I tried banging the rear brake pedal thinking it may be a brake lock up but that did nothing but bend my brake rod. So I aim for the curb and calculate a decent slow down by the time I hit it, plus I'll be off the road. I lower my kickstand in hopes I can just come to a screeching halt and be done with the obviously loud embarrassing situation

Anyway I hit the large curb with a bit too much velocity and fly off the bike on to the sidewalk. (not violent more of like a dude falling off a bike in a dumb and dumber type movie) Ninja roll right to my feet and get up as of nothing was out of the ordinary. However people bum rush me out of eateries and bars thinking I'm dead or something, someone called the cops. It's was a mess. I'm just like, yea I'm fine this happens all the time trying to play it off.

Total suckitude.

Local 33er walker or XwalkerX as his moniker is comes to my rescue on his pan. But of course runs out of gas a block away. So I wait while people crowd around and ask me stupid questions about my bike. He texts me that he retrieved gas and is about to return on his rescue mission. This is the only cool part of the story. All of a sudden BOOM! Everyone nearby ducks. People on patio diners are dropping their silverware. His backfire on the first kick scared the living shit out of everyone.

Regardless this lame story ends with walker retrieving my truck from home, us physically lifting the bike since the back wheel isn't budging and getting it on the lift. We find a blown wheel bearing, busted hub and torn up axel.

Moral of the story... Never try to half ass a Harley wheel and hub to a triumph axel, sprocket, brake set up. Just lace the fucker to a cotton spool and be done with it and you too will not have to be an asshole

[OnryAndMean]

Nothing that good, but I was riding with a lady once and as i was parking in front of a crowded outdoor eating section at a restaurant, she hopped off like a dumbass without getting the okay or letting me know and I nearly laid the fucker down with both my feet planted. I looked like a noob with a good 30 people laughing at me. That was embarrassing.

[NIGHTTIGER666]

This is more embarrassing to the other guy, not me. I posted this story two weeks ago but there are updates now which make it even better.

Two Fridays ago, while working with a friend on my bike, he talks me into taking his new Ironhead for a spin. I'm doing maybe 35-40 on a main road and this big fat drunk kid ran into the road trying to cross, while I had the right of way. He saw me and completely froze. I had to swerve and ended up falling and getting cut up and rashed pretty well. I got up and moved the bike over to the sidewalk. The dude then starts crying, freaking out about how he could've killed me. I ask him for a cigarette so I can calm down a bit and he obliges, yet still shaking. I talk him out of calling the cops and ambulance because nothing is serious and ACAB(bike wasn't registered). I left my phone at the garage so the guy's friend grabbed a car to alert my friends what had happened. They roll through and we're all high fives while the drunk kid is still freaking out. He really wants to make it right to us, which is respectable. My vans were shredded up so he offered to buy me a new pair and pay for the damages to the bike (~$400).

The next Monday, the dude rolls into my bar, still noticeably afraid of me and hands me an envelope with cash for new sneakers. He then meets up with the owner of the bike and asks him to sign a waiver before he pays him. The kid wrote it up himself and it's ridiculous. He admits liability in the waiver and says if we sign it, then we can't sue him. Now while I never had an intention of suing the poor kid, I strongly believe in the gentleman's agreement. This waiver pretty much creates a paper trail and the admission of guilt is fucking himself over.

I guess this kid has never interacted with "bikers" before, but his constant trembling around us is pretty mindblowing.

Fucking squares.

[bonesxl1100]

After a long day of riding then hitting a couple bars on the way home we pull up to the toll to get back into PA. I stood up to dig in my pockets for the toll with my right hand and my left hand is holding the bars. Well, it was one of the hottest days of the year and i guess i had the bike leaning a little too much to my right and the damn grip pulls right off of the bars. Im standing there with a grip in my hand and the bike on the ground. All my friends saw as well as all the cagers. Sucked.

Another time we're at the local bar. Bout a mile from my house. Im ready to leave so i go outside to my bike. Strap my helmet on, hop on the bike and start her up. Like a moron, and i dont usually do this, i trust the damn nuetral light and start it without the clutch pulled in. Bike was still in gear. The bike shoots out from under me and procedes to climb the damn outside wall of the bar. I flew back on my ass in front of about 10 other bikers. That one really hurt my pride.

[backwithabang]

You should have told him those vans were schaaf syndicates and cost you 350

[BillyT]

Buddy of mine had just gotte back from Austin with a 95 Triumph Thunderbird. Being that he hadn't ridden a street bike in almost ever, I offered to take it around the block to shake it down from him. Check the brakes, make sure it shifts and whatever, just make sure it's safe for him to get on. So I cruise around the block, and everything checks out. Pop a wheelie pulling into his driveway, even... Just being Billy Bad ass... Ask him if he's ready for it, says yeah... so I ride up to the top of his drive way to turn around, and just flop over onto my side... like I lost all motor skills and just fell over. Broke the headlight, broke the turn signal, and broke my ego, straight in half. Its funny now, and was kinda funny then, but I felt like the biggest jack ass.

Add to it, that a week earlier, he asked if he could ride my bike around the parking lot at work, and I told him that I didn't think it was a good idea, anything could happen... then BAM! I drop his bike before he even gets to ride it. ha ha... oh man...

[BillyT]

Another time we're at the local bar. Bout a mile from my house. Im ready to leave so i go outside to my bike. Strap my helmet on, hop on the bike and start her up. Like a moron, and i dont usually do this, i trust the damn nuetral light and start it without the clutch pulled in. Bike was still in gear. The bike shoots out from under me and procedes to climb the damn outside wall of the bar. I flew back on my ass in front of about 10 other bikers. That one really hurt my pride.

The first time I took my little Honda to the drag strip, I tried to start it in gear and it almost plowed into the back of a bunch of big black guys sport bikes... that was awesome.

[NIGHTTIGER666]

You're a bad friend.

[Perches]

At least most of these are simple mistakes.... not complete idiocy on your part. Riding home after an all day ride, I was about a thousand feet from my house so I decided "why not?" and did a seat stand. Something I've done a million times, but this time I was just too tired to be acting stupid, and a wind gust blew me right off the back of the bike. After rolling about ten feet I jump up and begin sprinting towards my bike, which is casually ghosting down the street.... It ends up in a hayfield, and my neighbor, sure enough, is about a minute behind me and see's me pulling my bike out of the field....... I may or may not have told him I swerved around a deer. Oh, cheers on my first post.

[YOURADHERE]

Tried taking off with the neck still locked. No one saw and only damage was a bent brake lever and a severly sprained ego.


One that I always felt like a total dickhead about. A few years back my brother had just graduated high school so he wanted to use some of his graduation money for a dirt bike. Finally found him one and drove him in my truck 2 hours there and 2 hours back to pickup a super clean 02 CR250. Got back home and he took it out for a spin to get the hang of it. After a while I convinced him to let me have a go at it, keep in mind that I hadn't been on a dirt bike in several years. I misjudged just how powerful those things are, coming out of a turn I over-revved a bit, let the clutch out quickly and paid, heavily. It slid out and then bit hard, tossed me off and flipped itself over backwards. I completely trashed my ankle and the bike landed on it's right slide and split the right radiator. He rode it all of 10 minutes before I fucked it all up. I felt so bad, I overnighted a new radiator which lightened my pocket about $250 and walked with a limp for the next couple months. Fuck that bike, I never rode it again, nor did I ever misjudge how much power something actually has.

[Guest]

When I first got my bike, I'd park it in front of our shop's cafeteria cause I could also see it out the window from my machine. Lunch break just started, only have a half hour and I was fucking starving. I didn't let it warm up, I went to go and it stalled. Slow dramatic lay down, with me ending up on my back yelling "FUUUUUCCCKKK" and throwing my arms in the air. All of my coworkers saw me through the windows. Finally picked her up and took off. Lil scratches on the clutch lever was all. My ego was hurt more.

[Hooligan80]

Here's my most embarrassing:

My buddy was being an asshole and wouldn't move his bike so I could finish cleaning out front at my work, so I told him to give me the keys and I'll move it so his lazy doesn't have to do shit. So he tosses me the keys top his CBR1000RR, and I start it up and start to make my round about low speed turn to go move it and laid then fucker down at low speed (6 miles per hour) with the bike landing on top of me pretty much. Yeah, I caught shit and they kept calling me a squid, until they realized and oil patch is what caused the front end to slide right out from under me. Two weeks later his buddy on a GSXR did the same exact thing only a little faster.

[Nottso]

It was the Spring of 1985. The house I owned at the time had a "storm cellar" entrance in the back yard that went to the basement. You'd raise the big doors, go down the steps, and there was a regular service door to the basement. The very first thing I did was build a ramp over the stairs so the bikes could spend the winters in the basement. This particular winter, I had had my '76 XLCH, as well as my brother's insane Water Buffalo (Suzuki GT 750, water cooled, 2 stroke triple) down there.

There was a lot of work in the Buffalo and it was stupid fast. It also had clip-ons and rear sets, all set up like a drag bike. So anyways, come Spring, it's time for me to get the bikes out and move 'em to the garage. I fire up the Sporty, let it warm up just a little, and chug it up the ramp like a tractor. No big deal, right?.

Next, I fire up the Buffalo. R-r-r-r-ring-a-ding-ding-dink. R-r-r-r-ring-a-ding-ding-dink. R-r-r-ing. R-r-r-r ing. Pretty quickly, the smoke is getting pretty thick in there and I gotta go. Mind you, this prick had plenty of horsepower, but not much torque. I won't be chugging this fucker up the ramp, I've got to get a bit of a running start. R-r-r-r-ring-a-ding-ding-dink. Back it up the far wall. R-r-r-r-ring-a-ding-ding-dink. Here I go...

While the Buckhorns on the Sporty sat me more upright, they also let me notice that I had to duck my melon going through the lower door. Not so on the Buffalo. I light that fucker off, get as much speed as I can in that short distance, and POW!!! The top of the doorway hit me square in the top of my dome. More accurately, it was my dome that assaulted the door frame, but who really cares?

I came to kind of slowly. Everything was like swimming around, there was smoke and blood everywhere, and I hear dink dink dink dink coming from the back yard. I crawl up the ramp, and there's all my neighbors, gathered around the Buffalo, there on its side, in the middle of the back yard. Still running, in first gear, saying dink dink dink dink as the back wheel turned very slowly.

As it turned out, I had enough speed so that the bike made it up and out of the basement without me. So now I'm standing there, swaying all over the place, trying to keep my feet and figure out wtf was going on when the stoner that lived next door says "Dude... we heard a buncha noise, and then a motorcycle came flyin' up outta the ground."

[Ansutton21]

Last summer I was gettin ready to leave in n out, and I seen a bunch of babes sittin outside smiling at me. I start up, and make a dramatic appearance of puttin my helmet on, top gun style. I pull out of my space and go to rev it a little cause now a few of these supple creatures are waving at me. Only problem was that when I grabbed that throttle my other hand was nowhere near the clutch, it wasn't fact up near my face doin a kinda princess Diana wave back at these high school hotties. I went sliding for about a good ten feet. God I looked retarded.

[JamesM]

Coming to a stop at a light, I down shift into first at about 10MPH and SNAP! goes my clutch cable, bike stalled, back tire drug and I fell over sideways with the bike in slow motion. Was pretty embarrassing. So was riding it home without the clutch in second gear.