D-Bags Say the Darndest Things

[SoCalGhostGunner]

My friend and I pulled into a gas station, him on a Vulcan 1500. Me on my softail. His Vulcan is set up like a homemade bagger. D-bag walks up:
D-bag : Nice bike. Is that a Harley?
James: No, it's a Kawasaki Vulcan.
D-bag: Oh, I thought it was a real bike.
James: Last time I checked it has two wheels and a motor.
D-bag: Only Harley makes real bikes.
James: Ya think so huh. What kind of bike do you ride?
D-bag: I don't have a bike. But this guy gets it (points at me). He's on a real bike.
Me: You said you don't have a bike?
D-bag: Yeah.
Me: Well then, we know what your opinion is worth. Dick.
D-bag: huffs off to a hatch back and tries to spin his tires on the way out of the parking lot.

[klondikekid64]

People that grind me are the ones that come up and start yakkin about the bikes they "used to have" and how they kinda forgot any exact facts when you ask them anything about their old pride and joy.

[Fings369]

D Bag to me and friends at a bar last year: So what do you guys do during football season?
Me with the most straight laced face: Drop acid and ride motorcycles...
After the guy leaves, a friend who doesn't ride chimes in and says, thats December and January Bro?!

I imagine the guy who asked was fairly puzzled...

I've heard a lot, my new bike broke down last night and a guy was asking me how many cubic inches my ironhead was, I can't do that conversion in my head, but the fact he was surprised I was riding home a bike I just bought was more confusing to me. I always try to ride my new whips home. I purchased it Sunday, changed the clutch cable that day, took the carb off, "rebuilt" it and took it back last night to get her home, now she is sitting a block away but she is closer to home and I didn't have to rent/borrow a truck.

Must say this is a fun thread!!!

[Guest]

OK so not really a d-bag but kinda. Back story my old man was 6'5" 315lbs Airborne Ranger And 1%er from way back I think in 1968ish After Nam for sure. Until he was murdered in 2002, And at the time grey beard to his belt buckle. I was 12 and pops decides he wants a brand new scoot. This is 1991. So to the dealership we go. Walk in


Salesman: How can I help ya
Pops: Looking to get a new bike.
Salesman: we have some nice sportsters over hear. (while looking at a 6'5" mountain who kicked his pan over with his hand)
Pops: BITCHES RIDE sportsters
Salesman: (who is smaller than me at 12) I RIDE A SPORTSTER!!
Pops: then your a bitch... now get me a salesMAN!!

Now I got nothing against sportys. If my fat ass could fit on them ide own 100 cause they can be nice. and there dirt cheap compared to big twins.

[kevinhd1200]

Here is one for ya'll. I had a guy come into the shop dressed as "Billy Bad Ass 1%er" biker complete with a ridiculously long wallet chain ( he was not a 1%er), and proceeded to tell me that there was something wrong with his bike. I asked "What's going on with your bike?" The guy replied, "Every time I pull in the clutch lever with the bike in gear, it's really hard to push the bike." I asked "Is the bike running?" He replies "No". -Well no shit buddy, ever hear of putting it in neutral? -What an idiot poser! I love how there are people out there who can dress the part, but have no clue about the bike they own. Maybe this guy should stay at home and watch another episode of Sons of Anarchy.